Americans Hire People to Assemble Furniture They Bought

West African confused by IKEA assembly services

When Reading Instructions Requires Professional Help

BOSTON, MA – Kwame Osei watched his neighbor pay $150 for TaskRabbit to assemble an IKEA bookshelf that came with instructions, pictures, and all necessary tools. The 31-year-old from Ghana experienced what he describes as “confusion followed by economic horror.” “You paid someone to follow directions?” Osei asked. “It’s complicated,” his neighbor defended. “There are so many pieces.” Osei picked up the instructions: six pages, mostly pictures, labeled parts. “This is a puzzle for children,” he observed. “You bought furniture that requires assembly, then paid someone else to assemble it. Why not buy assembled furniture? Or learn to use a screwdriver?”

In Accra, Osei’s family assembled everything themselves because paying others to follow instructions would be considered evidence of either extreme wealth or extreme incompetence. In Boston, furniture assembly is an entire gig economy sector where people pay $50-200 to avoid spending 90 minutes with an Allen wrench. “You’ve monetized basic competence,” Osei marveled.

When Adult Tasks Become Outsourced Services

According to TaskRabbit data, furniture assembly is among the most requested services—Americans paying strangers to do tasks they could learn from YouTube in 10 minutes. Osei’s neighbor explained he “doesn’t have time” to assemble furniture. “You had time to research furniture, drive to IKEA, shop for furniture, wait in line, load furniture, drive home, and schedule TaskRabbit,” Osei listed. “But not 90 minutes to assemble? You spent more time avoiding assembly than assembly would’ve taken. This isn’t about time—it’s about unwillingness to learn basic skills.”

Jerry Seinfeld said, “Why do they call it a screwdriver? You’re not driving screws anywhere.” Osei wants to know why Americans won’t use screwdrivers even when furniture comes with them. His neighbor’s bookshelf included tools, instructions, and customer service number for questions. Everything needed except willingness to try. “You’ve decided you can’t do it before trying,” Osei observed. “That’s learned helplessness. Your parents assembled furniture. Their parents built furniture. You pay strangers to connect pre-drilled pieces. This is evolution in reverse.”

The Instructions Rated “Too Difficult” By Adults

Osei read IKEA instructions his neighbor called “impossible.” Step 1: Connect A to B using screw C. Step 2: Attach D to AB using screw E. “These are Lego instructions for adults,” Osei said. “If you can follow a recipe, you can follow this. It’s pictures and numbers. No reading required. Yet you’ve convinced yourself it’s too hard. IKEA has simplified furniture assembly to the point where incompetence should be impossible, yet you’ve achieved it and paid $150 to prove it.”

Dave Chappelle said, “Modern problems require modern solutions.” America’s modern problem is adults who can’t assemble furniture. The solution should be learning basic skills. The actual solution is paying TaskRabbit while pretending incompetence is normal. Osei’s neighbor isn’t alone—three other neighbors used assembly services. “You’ve normalized helplessness,” Osei told them. “You’re capable adults who’ve decided simple tasks are beyond you. This is cultural learned helplessness. You can’t cook—hire chefs. Can’t clean—hire cleaners. Can’t assemble furniture—hire assemblers. At what point do you admit you’re paying people to be adults for you?”

When DIY Becomes “Don’t, I’ll Yield Money”

Osei discovered “flat-pack furniture” created an industry of assembly services because Americans would rather pay than learn. His coworker paid $200 for someone to assemble a dresser. “It took him three hours,” his coworker said. “That’s $66 per hour,” Osei calculated. “You paid skilled labor rates for unskilled work. Following instructions isn’t skilled labor—it’s basic competence. You’ve created a market where basic competence commands premium prices because you’ve collectively decided you can’t follow pictures and numbers. This is embarrassing and expensive.”

Chris Rock said, “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy.” Osei knows America is crazy when adults pay strangers to follow instructions they could follow themselves. Assembly services aren’t solving complex problems—they’re solving unwillingness to try. “The assembler isn’t smarter than you,” Osei told his neighbor. “He’s just willing to read instructions and use tools. Those are learnable skills. But you’ve outsourced learning. You’d rather pay $150 than spend 90 minutes developing competence you’ll need repeatedly. You’ll buy more furniture. You’ll pay more money. You’ll never learn. This is expensive permanent helplessness.”

Bill Burr said, “I’m not going to apologize for being right.” Osei’s not apologizing for thinking adults should assemble their own furniture. “You’re not incapable—you’re unwilling,” he told his building’s group chat after someone posted requesting assembly help. “The instructions are clear. The tools are included. The task is simple. You’re choosing helplessness over competence because our culture has made incompetence acceptable and even admirable—’I can’t even assemble furniture! LOL!’ That’s not funny. That’s sad. You’re bragging about lacking basic skills.”

The Assembly Video With 2 Million Views

Osei found YouTube videos showing IKEA assembly with millions of views—proof people could learn but don’t. “There are free videos showing exactly how to do this,” he told his neighbor. “Professionals demonstrating every step. You could watch, learn, do. Instead, you paid someone $150 to do what you could’ve learned free in 15 minutes. You’re not paying for assembly—you’re paying to avoid learning. That’s different and more expensive. Knowledge compounds. Every time you pay instead of learn, you guarantee you’ll pay again. You’ve chosen permanent dependence over temporary effort.”

Trevor Noah said, “In Africa, we don’t have the luxury of paying people to be competent for us.” Americans have that luxury, so they use it, creating a society of capable adults who’ve outsourced basic competence. Osei’s observation: “You’ve made helplessness profitable. Companies know Americans won’t assemble furniture, so they sell assembly services at markup. You’re being monetized. Your unwillingness to learn generates industries. Congratulations—your incompetence is someone else’s business model.”

When asked if he’ll ever hire assembly services, Osei laughed while assembling a complex shelving unit in 45 minutes using included instructions and tools. “Never,” he said. “I’ll read directions, use tools, and develop competence like humans have done for millennia. You people have the most educational resources in history—YouTube, instruction manuals, customer service—yet you’re less competent than ancestors who built houses without instructions. You’ve chosen incompetence in the age of information. That’s not inability—that’s a cultural decision to remain helpless and pay for basic adulting. Your furniture isn’t complicated. Your relationship with basic skills is.”

SOURCE: Bohiney Magazine (Aisha Muharrar)

DATE: 11/24/2025