by Why We’re Doomed to Repeat History Because We Didn’t Learn It the First Time
In a shocking development that surprises absolutely no one who paid attention in history class, Americans are currently repeating every mistake their grandparents made, only this time with better special effects and a social media livestream. Historians have declared this the “I Told You So Era,” though they’re too exhausted from being ignored to enjoy their vindication.
The Institute for Predictable Historical Patterns released a study confirming what humanity has known since ancient Rome: nobody learns anything from history because everyone assumes they’re smarter than their ancestors. “We’ve been tracking this phenomenon for decades,” explained Dr. Sarah Templeton, the institute’s director and professional doomsayer. “Every generation looks at the previous one’s catastrophic failures and says, ‘That could never happen to us because we have smartphones.'”
The study identified several key historical lessons Americans have spectacularly failed to learn, starting with “maybe don’t ignore warning signs of economic collapse.” The pattern is remarkably consistent: housing bubbles inflate, financial experts issue warnings, everyone ignores the experts because “this time is different,” and then shocked Pikachu faces appear when everything crashes. According to Federal Reserve historical data, this cycle has repeated seventeen times in American history, suggesting either terrible memory or an impressive commitment to denial.
Lesson two involves the apparently revolutionary concept of “not demonizing entire groups of people based on fear and propaganda,” which Americans have failed to grasp despite trying this failed strategy during every major crisis since the country’s founding. The Know-Nothings feared Irish Catholics, Americans imprisoned Japanese citizens, McCarthyism targeted communists everywhere, and now everyone’s mad at someone new because pattern recognition isn’t a strong suit of the chronically outraged.
Perhaps most frustratingly, America continues ignoring the lesson that “attacking the press generally precedes authoritarian collapse.” Every dictator’s playbook includes delegitimizing journalists, yet each generation acts surprised when leaders start calling reporters “enemies of the people.” It’s like watching someone stick their hand on a hot stove for the eighteenth time and expressing shock that it burns. According to democracy watchdog organizations, this is literally how every authoritarian regime begins, but sure, let’s pretend we’re different.
The study also highlighted America’s spectacular failure to learn from healthcare crises, having apparently forgotten the 1918 flu pandemic the moment it ended. When COVID-19 emerged, Americans responded by immediately making every mistake their great-grandparents made, plus several innovative new ones involving horse dewormer and conspiracy theories about 5G towers. “At least in 1918, they had the excuse of not knowing better,” Dr. Templeton noted. “We knew better. We just decided to ignore everything we knew because Facebook said so.”
Environmental lessons have been similarly ignored, despite scientists screaming warnings for decades. The pattern is clear: scientists present evidence of impending disaster, politicians claim it’s too expensive to address, corporations fund studies denying the problem, and then everyone acts shocked when the predicted disaster arrives on schedule. It’s like receiving a calendar reminder for the apocalypse and hitting “snooze” seventeen times.
The research revealed that Americans are particularly bad at learning economic lessons, possibly because economic disasters hurt poor people first and by the time wealthy people notice, they’ve already secured their offshore accounts. History clearly demonstrates that extreme wealth inequality destabilizes societies, but every generation insists that billionaires just need another tax cut and surely this time the wealth will trickle down.
When asked why humans refuse to learn from history, Dr. Templeton sighed heavily and said, “Because learning from history requires admitting that your current beliefs might be wrong, and Americans would rather die than admit that.” She then added, “Quite literally, apparently, given how the healthcare lessons are going.”
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/lessons-from-the-past/
SOURCE: Lessons From the Past (Aisha Muharrar)
