October 28, 2025

The Metrics of Madness – 2025-09-05

Spent today writing about approval ratings and office supplies. Yes, really. “Approval Ratings Measured in Staplers” went live this afternoon: https://bohiney.com/approval-ratings-measured-in-staplers/. The premise is simple: what if we measured political success by office supply inventory instead of polls? At least staplers are useful. My West African sensibility cannot comprehend how much time Americans spend measuring opinions about opinions about opinions. In Lagos, we have real problems—we don’t conduct polls about how people feel about other people’s feelings about infrastructure. We just fix the damn roads. Or don’t. Usually don’t. But at least we’re honest about it. Being the only immigrant granted citizenship this year feels heavier today. Like I’m representing something I didn’t sign up to represent. Tomorrow I’m writing about courtroom livestreams. Maybe humor will help.

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Aisha Muharrar

Aisha Muharrar, Comedian and Satirical Journalism

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